When I was growing up, we loved those ”What’s Missing” photo quizzes in the newspaper. Find all the differences in two nearly identical photos. It was easy to spot the first few. However, it was painfully, excruciatingly, tear-your-hair-out frustrating to get them all. In other words, most of us can find the obvious. It takes patience and tenacity to look with a fresh eye and successfully complete the task.

The same thing is true when you’re drafting an email to your team. The first draft is easy. You know what you want to say. You are clear about what needs to be done. The question is what’s missing? The answer is usually -your audience.

Are you writing for you? Or writing for them?

Recently I’ve been coaching a leader who is in a turnaround situation. He took over a faltering business. His predecessor was a lousy communicator. We agreed he would start sending out Friday email updates on the business. This is one of my favorite ways to ramp up the communication with your team. People really appreciate knowing what’s happening. They love the regularity –it’s a great way to engage and get people moving in one direction.

When he started, he would dictate memos to his communications person. The result was she repeated back what he said in the first draft. And it was all about him – filled with the word “I” instead of the more inclusive “you” and “we.”

So we did a second draft. Same topic. But this time it was about the team. What they were doing. How they were supporting the effort. The creativity, drive and focus they were bringing to the tasks at hand. The roles they could play in the turnaround. He has their attention now. Incredible feedback on these Friday notes.

The answer to “what’s missing” in so many communiqués is the “us” part. I would encourage you to take a second look at that first draft, and the second time around, write about them. Use inclusive language. Highlight their roles, contributions and accomplishments. In a side by side comparison it will be pretty obvious which one to send.

Busy leaders are driven to complete tasks. Email is important. It takes patience and tenacity to find what’s missing. It is oh-so-satisfying to get it right.